Stratagem 27 Anger indicates a weak point

“I WILL NOT CALM DOWN!”

 - Abe Simpson

“Should your opponent surprise you by becoming particularly angry at an argument, you must urge it with all the more zeal; not only because it is a good thing to make him angry, but because it may be presumed that you have here put your finger on the weak side of his case, and that just here he is more open to attack than even for the moment you perceive.”

Arthur Schopenhauer, Die Kunst,Recht zu behalten - The Art Of Controversy

Somebody said something I don’t want to mention more specifically because it is literally sickening and I don't want to spread the contagion by making this post googlable by using specific labels. The disgusting thing was said by somebody who is too awful to mention by name and it was widely reported on the media. 

I respectfully disagree with Arthur (may I call you Artie?) Schopenhauer. Making your opponent angry isn’t a nice way to win an argument. Poor Grandpa Simpson always falls for this.

Apparently, Artie didn’t have a strategy for applying passive aggression to win arguments, or even to beat his opponent figuratively senseless with words. Or maybe before we invented the term passive-aggressive, it was simply known as poking your opponent in the eye with a sharp metaphorical stick.

You don’t need an assault rifle of anger when you use your words. You can apply your rapier wit to leave your opponent’s arguments in tatters like a piñata at the end of a 10-year-old’s birthday party. You can deploy the RPG of your sarcasm to obliterate your opponent like a tornado in a china shop. You can drop leaden irony to crush opponents like a balloon of lard thrown on a hot sidewalk from a third floor balcony.

But be careful how you deploy anger even in words. In these Dies Irae anger management is a survival skill that should only be employed defensively, because anger and rage can escalate and kill. Anger should never be a strategy of first resort in any discussion with someone obstinate and already angry. Especially when decorum has been beaten bloody and kicked to the curb. And when the broadcast, cable and social media talking heads insist on keeping the "conversation" going. 

I think anger betrays stupid more than weak. It should go without saying that stupid questions deserve stupid answers. Hopefully (sic) answers the stupid person doesn’t get. Also, use your word powers for good. A good mission statement would be “Hulk only crush Stupid”. So my response to the statements referenced below may go a bit over the head of its intended target.

I am not angry at what that man who is so stupid they should create a new Nobel Prize in Stupidity for him said. I do believe however, that he is a sick fuck. 

Then again, maybe Artie is on to something about anger exposing weakness. the weakness apparent in Bad Comb-Over’s unconfined anger at women. He wears it proudly like a badge of rapey honor by a privileged fraternity boy; or like Bill Cosby with roofies and Viagra. He is overcompensating for his impotence and feelings of mental and moral inferiority to women by joking about incest, marital rape and menstruation; and by fat shaming and throwing women away shortly after menarche. He is apparently distracted by shiny things. I expect soon he will put FGM on the table and then say we wouldn’t even be talking about it if he hadn’t raised the important subject. His anger at women highlights his feelings of inadequacy and weakness, poor baby.

But I’m not inclined respond to his anger with anger. Why poke with a stick when I can ignore with disdain? Life's too short to engage with such toxic stupidity. I’m not sure what Schopenhauer’s strategy was numbered, but I will respond with words instead of letting Narcissism Impersonated’s anger provoke me to sinking to his level.

My father’s explanation of the rhetorical device I employ below was that if you’re in a shit throwing contest, always remember the winner isn’t the person who throws the most shit, it’s the person who has the least shit sticking to him when the fight is over. I distinctly remember learning this dinner-table wisdom at the XXL picnic table Dad made and covered with orange Formica that had that boomerang pattern.

Accordingly, if I was bothered to continue a conversation as rewarding as spitting into the wind, I'd say this. Sir, I’d say, I’m rubber you’re glue. Everything you say bounces off me and sticks to you. 

Although I would never literally ever touch a gun, I would figuratively give the rich narcissist with the bad comb-over a few extra holes to bleed out of as his sharp sticks aimed for my eyes boomeranged on him.

I call it the Karma Ricochet Strategy. The bad man shot first and it’s started to come back to him. Please don’t be mad sir, because the weaker sex isn’t staying around to watch you bleed out. Figuratively speaking. We’ve already literally forgotten you, little man.